My Resume

Michael ************
288 East 2*th Street Apt ***
NY, NY 10***
6** *** ****
mikelikestosleep@gmail.com

WORK EXPERIENCE

2009 - Present
SLEEPING-NY, NY
Going to bed late, and waking up late. Dreaming about flying, being able to dunk a basketball. Occasional nightmare or dream that makes you feel weird the next day. Also: naps.

2009 – Present
PROCRASTINATING
Waiting to do important things. Coming up with what I think are valid excuses as to why it can wait another day. Sometimes not getting it done on time.

2009-Present
SURFING THE INTERNET
Have daily sessions on the internet. Some last hours Check Facebook and Twitter. Start multiple conversations via IM and G Chat. Look things up and search for funny videos. Also send around anything funny I find.

2009-Present
GOING TO THE BATHROOM
Going to the bathroom to urinate. Looking in the mirror. Doing funny faces and voices. Sometimes remove bowels.


2009-Present
EATING ICE CREAM
Usually Ben & Jerrys; Cookie Dough or Half Baked. Also Haagen Dasz Cookies and Cream

2009-Present
WATCHING TV
Watch shows such as: Saturday Night Live, 30 Rock, The Office, East Bound and Down, Curb Your Enthusiasm, and LOST. Also watch a lot of movies.


2009-Present
ORDER DELIVERY TAKE OUT
Order a lot of sushi, Italian etc. Order from Odessa’s late at night.



2009-Present
EAT CEREAL
All different brands. Mainly Honey Bunches of Oats, Frosted Mini Wheats, Smart Start, and LIFE. Sometimes for dinner (most times).

2009-Present
LISTEN TO MUSIC
Listen to music in headphones. Illegally download albums that I look forward to. Rip songs from youtube videos. Occasional itunes purchase.

Will provide many reputable references upon request.


SKILLS

Good conversation, have an apartment, likes art, has some friends, sets unattainable goals, internet savvy, good at watching youtubes, plays fantasy sports.