mikelikestosleep.tumblr.com

I designed that banner up there that says The Sky Is Falling

2009-12-17T01:37:00.001-08:00

so basically you need to get off my nuts ok?

MIKELIKESTOSLEEP.TUMBLR.COM

2009-09-09T22:19:00.000-07:00

mikelikestosleep.tumblr.com

Sorry Blogger

2009-09-04T13:01:00.000-07:00

I think that I am moving this operation over to tumblr entirely. Tumblr has been hosting my (f)art page for months. I like Tumblr better. So this blog might become dead space. If you want to go to my new blog I will make this easy for you by providing a link below.

here is that link I promised earlier:

MikeLikesToSleep.tumbr.com

This did not disappoint

2009-09-04T12:32:00.001-07:00

at all.

2009-09-03T20:51:00.000-07:00

is it weird that I am thinking less about the cuteness of this puppy dog, and more about how the camera man won't help him get off his back like a little turtle

via fugeesandfunyuns

2009-09-03T20:44:00.000-07:00

2009-09-03T20:36:00.000-07:00

Just opened this bad boy up to see if I had any good ideas

2009-09-03T18:55:00.000-07:00

I've been on fire obviously

2009-09-03T16:43:00.000-07:00

Extract (movie) Promo: Beavis & Butthead return

2009-09-02T23:44:00.000-07:00

I had a whole thing typed here about my theory that the ppl that made Extract must have a connection with the ppl who made Beavis and Butthead (which is the only logical way I could see this happening). Low and behold it took 20 seconds on google for me to find out that Extract was written by Mike Judge (or I could have paid attention to the advertising). I wasted my time and your time. Enjoy.

@ Yahoo! Video

**Butthead sounds like Hank Hill**

#itmightbeover

2009-09-02T11:10:00.000-07:00

This was the number one trending topic on twitter today, so I decided to click on it to see what ppl were saying. I was thinking maybe the end of the world or something. Boy was I delighted by some of the "tweets" I came across.

w exactly tf is this?

2009-09-01T22:30:00.000-07:00

lol

The 3rd HOPPS commercial

2009-09-01T22:04:00.000-07:00

This company is owned by my friend Jahmal and is super rad. He seems to be making all the right moves with the direction.

Support the fuck out of hoppsskateboards.com please. Thnx.

The greatest skateboarder of all time is...

2009-09-01T21:26:00.000-07:00

wtf. cant wait for the Chocolate vid. Spotted over at RE1000.com

Ate at the Olive Tree Cafe

2009-09-01T14:39:00.000-07:00

they let you draw on the tables :)

Today

2009-09-01T13:58:00.000-07:00

Facebook has its finger on the pulse of style

2009-08-29T20:10:00.000-07:00

nice bro-hawk dude

I guess my question would be: would this have been a mullet if this were the late 80's?

I'm starting my days with this song for the next week

2009-08-29T19:19:00.000-07:00

I'll see how it works out. If the results are positive I will continue this exercise.

A bunch of old beats I made

2009-08-28T09:58:00.000-07:00

I used to make beats on an mpc. I don't really do it too much anymore, but here are some beats that I made throughout the years if you'd like to listen to them.

My Resume

2009-08-26T23:52:00.000-07:00

Michael ************
288 East 2*th Street Apt ***
NY, NY 10***
6** *** ****
mikelikestosleep@gmail.com

WORK EXPERIENCE

2009 - Present
SLEEPING-NY, NY
Going to bed late, and waking up late. Dreaming about flying, being able to dunk a basketball. Occasional nightmare or dream that makes you feel weird the next day. Also: naps.

2009 – Present
PROCRASTINATING
Waiting to do important things. Coming up with what I think are valid excuses as to why it can wait another day. Sometimes not getting it done on time.

2009-Present
SURFING THE INTERNET
Have daily sessions on the internet. Some last hours Check Facebook and Twitter. Start multiple conversations via IM and G Chat. Look things up and search for funny videos. Also send around anything funny I find.

2009-Present
GOING TO THE BATHROOM
Going to the bathroom to urinate. Looking in the mirror. Doing funny faces and voices. Sometimes remove bowels.

2009-Present
EATING ICE CREAM
Usually Ben & Jerrys; Cookie Dough or Half Baked. Also Haagen Dasz Cookies and Cream

2009-Present
WATCHING TV
Watch shows such as: Saturday Night Live, 30 Rock, The Office, East Bound and Down, Curb Your Enthusiasm, and LOST. Also watch a lot of movies.

2009-Present
ORDER DELIVERY TAKE OUT
Order a lot of sushi, Italian etc. Order from Odessa’s late at night.

2009-Present
EAT CEREAL
All different brands. Mainly Honey Bunches of Oats, Frosted Mini Wheats, Smart Start, and LIFE. Sometimes for dinner (most times).

2009-Present
LISTEN TO MUSIC
Listen to music in headphones. Illegally download albums that I look forward to. Rip songs from youtube videos. Occasional itunes purchase.

Will provide many reputable references upon request.

SKILLS

Good conversation, have an apartment, likes art, has some friends, sets unattainable goals, internet savvy, good at watching youtubes, plays fantasy sports.

Breaking bread on IM with Jeff

2009-08-26T10:58:00.000-07:00

4:15 PM
slide off like an escapade, renegade on ice, lemonade Clark, the haze is nice/the goldilocks rock sapphire chain is right…ya’ll watch what ya’ll say in ya’ mic

sklogs
im like price is right, cheese makes me whine like i just dined out tonight, wine sipping ice crossed like star crossed bar fights, aights, skloke me till fall back casually, like rasually, butler, get on the bitch and nut her, in the nose membranes till she knows she's a hoes clempains

the first half of that was amazing

the ending was the best

ending sucked

sklokes

4:20 PM
fly kites scrape flights make nights seem right. im like jesus the way i make opponents melt in my mouth like peanuts in reeces pieces red brown and gold...rock sneaks get freaks

heatah heatah, my wife beatah, tape you to the floor longevity mice readah, fuck them sideways until they my way, light my gillante, and slide my dick in the eye pie trays, keep them mean for the right start up kit, make you trip over my 20 hour long weed smoke trip

petah heatah wife beatah pumpkin eatah make me move places and feetahs the readah cant read illiterate legitimate my conglomeration nation is a pill a fit. stay off coast with toast roast a pot pie pot roastah roadstah take out the perkalator and make a makiato retahado

my crew be madd young but about 50 yrs old, looking mean mother fuckers with both grey hair and pimples, while i wear a balloon hat that matches my crig bat, sip soda out the beer can and flirt with milf's labia fat, but that's old news for these peeps, as i regularly write geeps, and slit wifeys and eat the corn on the cops wifey's baginas till they slimey, and grimy, crooked ass cops

if we put all these together we could make a song

lets do that

trade verses

make a rap song

that was actually wifey's vagainees

we would have to actually rap all of that

yeah

be dope

i would need a 2 liter bottle of coke, 2 forty OZ of bud, and maybe a hit off the weed bowl
and it would be easu
y

im with it

sure, let's do it

2009-08-26T10:11:00.000-07:00

Sneezes are fucking nasty dude

2009-08-25T21:41:00.001-07:00

Cross-Contamination Diagram

2009-08-24T15:14:00.000-07:00

via the New York Department Of Health And Mental Hygeins Food Protection Course

Brock Davis is a motherfucker

2009-08-24T14:39:00.000-07:00

and a genius

I finally bought a fixed gear

2009-08-24T10:44:00.000-07:00

LOL

2009-08-24T10:13:00.001-07:00

via danny franzese

Pretty Presumptuous

2009-08-24T09:46:00.000-07:00

Really?

2009-08-24T08:24:00.000-07:00

http://www.365black.com/365black/index.jsp

http://www.myinspirasian.com/

http://www.myinspirasian.com/asian_phrases/index.html

Modern Day Living

2009-08-23T21:47:00.001-07:00

A short video I made displaying some of my modern amenitites

Modern Day Living - watch more funny videos

2009-08-23T12:57:00.000-07:00

The Negotiating Table - watch more funny videos

Obnoxious

2009-08-22T09:46:00.001-07:00

A lot of Narcissists are freaking out

2009-08-20T07:57:00.000-07:00

2009-08-19T11:21:00.000-07:00

I don't listen to too much rap anymore but when I do I still love that murderous shit.

I googled "is the"

2009-08-18T22:38:00.000-07:00

lol at the fifth one. wtf. also ppl seem to be worried about 2012.

to save you the trouble HERE is the page for the first result you go to if you search the fifth suggestion.

EDIT*

I just also decided to google "how". The fourth suggestion: another pregnancy inquiry. Also I know how to tie a tie. A Windsor Knot. None of this "half" Windsor bullshit

2009-08-18T22:08:00.001-07:00

Motherfucker this IS life!

This looks awesome as fuck

2009-08-18T12:29:00.000-07:00

This is amazing

2009-08-18T10:02:00.001-07:00

http://www.famefestival.it/

Radiohead released a new song today for free

2009-08-17T08:21:00.000-07:00

on their site:

http://www.radiohead.com/deadairspace/index.php?a=497

DL it!

these are my twisted words:

written and played by radiohead.
recorded and put together by nigel godrich.
tracing paper images by donwood and tchock.
additional engineering by drew brown.
technology maintained by plank.

published by 41GP Music ltd

30 Rock is a Rip Off of the Muppets?

2009-08-17T06:44:00.000-07:00

This is a good post:

http://ow.ly/kfuM

via: Bryan Lynch

Click on the faces

2009-08-16T10:42:00.000-07:00

Danny Mcbride is still my hero

chair

2009-08-15T00:00:00.000-07:00

Youtube comments

2009-08-13T13:45:00.000-07:00

Abrahnadurbrak (5 months ago)

i ain't even know why you bitch wanna stick with this shit,maybe your anger wanna too blow too or your just another ignorant fuckin fool?anyway walkin milk,black made hip hop now yo wanna copy that when yo ain't even got the dick to fuck,weak is your little dick and your skill of surviving on the street,you bitch ass prick,maybe i'm white maybe i'm black i still ain't give a shit cuz this game it's a gap and you fuckin humans ain't know to play it,b real?why ya ain't put the all name fat lazyBoy

jaidaphire (2 months ago)

Abrahna-Snipey sockpuppet master,

the leaves provided you don't write the ODORANT pasture land of my "Brustes", so read well. grab and get distant with a death, the regular roots, okay? the winter it freezes from a distant, that is increased in the high cover, the sensitive leaves one year bloomed you out again, where you have withdrawn it is presented again. don't the five know they learn a lot? it's beyond you. it discovers who? or inhale? impossible!

------------------------------------------------------

Golden Eagles will eat rabbits, deer, other mammals. Bald Eagles are strickly aquatic hunters and will generally eat fish and marine mammals in the wild. In a rehabilitation setting yes they will eat rabbits although that is not their food of choice.
Check yo'self.

------------------------------------------------------

50centsTV (1 month ago)

wrd , this light skin is them white lookin spics ,, im wat crakers call latino but i look not white , black indian , not a italian ,, yeah , whites suk at everything , OHH yeah this shit is TRASH !!! total crap !! decent beat this nigguh sux !!!

Mtv

2009-08-13T08:32:00.000-07:00

This Poll is funny to me

2009-08-12T21:47:00.000-07:00

probably the way he worded the question.

This guy is awesome

2009-08-12T21:35:00.000-07:00

I just saw him on Conan.

"I think I inhaled her" LOL

New Jahmal Williams Interview

2009-08-12T13:17:00.000-07:00

Jahmal is the king of Boston. I was in awe of him every time I would see him skate when I was younger. I later got to know him and he is just a rad dude and is also an amazing artist. I see him skating in Manhattan all the time and his company Hopps is one that I support 100%. Check out this interview with him from juxtapoz.com:

http://www.juxtapoz.com/9500-jahmal-williams

I want things like this in our lives

2009-08-11T23:53:00.001-07:00

Email attachment I just received

2009-08-10T23:21:00.000-07:00

from my friend Jeffrey

Is this guys name ironic?

2009-08-10T22:02:00.000-07:00

or is he just working it.

New Mike Graham Interview

2009-08-10T21:29:00.000-07:00

On bobshirt. Good to hear from him and that he's skating. I was with Mike Graham pretty much 24 hours a day for a good 4 year portion of my life. Good times.

http://www.bobshirt.com/V2/PAGES/MikeG.html

-----------------------------------------------------------

Grahams FIT part

I'm building a helicopter

2009-08-10T11:01:00.000-07:00

Never Forget

2009-08-10T01:00:00.000-07:00

Pepto Bismol Breakdance Commercial - watch more funny videos

YES

2009-08-09T21:35:00.000-07:00

I don't know what this is from. Hopefully a new movie.

It's been a tough year for baseballs Chris (B) Young

2009-08-09T17:02:00.000-07:00

via yahoo:

Young went 0-for-4 with three strikeouts in Saturday's loss to the Nats, and then got locked in the bathroom in the visitor's clubhouse for 30 minutes after the game, the Arizona Republic reports. Young had to wait until maintenance workers were able to pry the door open.

DEAR EVERYONE WHO READS THIS BLOG:

2009-08-08T20:43:00.000-07:00

This is still my blog. I just changed the look. Keep all the emails about how incredible my blog is coming and stay classy as shit.

rgrds
Michael

2009-08-08T14:38:00.000-07:00

This Place Used To Rule

2009-08-07T00:20:00.001-07:00

For sale

2009-08-06T22:06:00.000-07:00

Short I did with my friend Jeffrey about a chair for sale.

Testing out a chair that was for sale to see if we wanted to buy it.

What exactly is Miracle Whip trying to accomplish here?

2009-08-05T21:56:00.000-07:00

It is still just mayonnaise right?

lol

The creative, developed by Chicago office of McGarry Bowen, takes a more relaxed, party approach and uses what Pritchard refers to as the “anthem.”

“We will not be quiet. We will not try to blend in—disappear in the background, play second fiddle,” declares the voiceover. “When we’re in a sandwich, a salad, a panini or crostini, you’ll know it.”

“We’re not like the others. We’ll never try to be. We’re our own unique one of a kind flavour,” the voiceover continues.

Kraft replaced its long running “Tangy zip” tag line with, “We are Miracle Whip. And we will not tone it down.”

“We want to celebrate who we are in a bold kind of way,” said Pritchard. “We’d like to attract some more younger households into the franchise...and bring more youthful energy back to the brand.”

---------------------------------

There are ppl getting paid for this shit. Ppl getting paid to sit around and say "I think we need more of the youth to purchase our MAYONNAISE." Lol. Complete waste of money. They could just put mayo on the shelf with absolutely no advertising at all and ppl will buy it. You know why? Because its MAYONNAISE. And ppl like it on their sandwiches.

Bobby Bottleservice

2009-08-05T09:45:00.001-07:00

Bobby Bottleservice talks to all the sexy internet ladies - watch more funny videos

Nick Cannon

2009-08-04T13:40:00.000-07:00

I made this post last month about things I hate, and had planned on probably expanding it in the future as I hate a lot of things. I just saw Nick Cannon on tv making his directorial debut and talking about it and I thought that I should add him to the list of things that I hate when I get around to it. Low and behold Mr. Cannon was ALREADY on the list. I feel like I'm doing something right.

Did You Know?

2009-08-04T00:06:00.000-07:00

about Fred Armisen:

He plays drums on three tracks on Les Savy Fav's 2007 album, Let's Stay Friends.[2]

Neither did I.

Via Wiki

This is pretty awesome

2009-08-02T21:12:00.000-07:00

from Brock Davis' blog

WIthout You by Mark Gormley

2009-08-02T15:30:00.001-07:00

Funny People

2009-08-01T19:03:00.000-07:00

Just went to see Funny People. I went by myself. First time I have ever done that (my girlfriend is OT). I enjoyed the movie very much. I've heard mixed reviews (from friends) and I really liked it. It got a little too touchy towards the end. As my friend Jeff just put it via IM and I quote:

why i wasn't all that into knocked up
apatow wants to be sooo "real"
sooo "natural"
i hate how his kids and wife are in it

I don't mind. HIs kids are funny and his wife is hilarious. But the comedy in the film just killed. So good. I'm gonna see it again for sure. Alot of cameos. James Tayor says "fuck Facebook" in the film. Eminem has a 5 minute cameo along with almost every relevant comedian today.

Living in New York is funny. I actually watched the movie with this D-bag you may remember from the film Road Trip.

I call him a d bag because I got to listen to him spew his opinion to his date (?) on the movie all the way down the escalators. He is in film you know so...
Anyways good film imo and I just blogged about it so theres that too.

***EDIT***
My every relevant comedian comment was a huge overstatement. It is also a weird coincidence that I saw the movie with the guy form Road Trip and a lot of ppl are upset over the road trip they take in the last quarter of the movie Funny People. Also that guy might not be a D Bag, I didn't really hear everything he was saying.

Fred Simmons On Conan

2009-07-30T00:17:00.001-07:00

My Conan Apperance - watch more funny videos

Just added a couple pictures to my art blog

2009-07-28T00:24:00.001-07:00

Do it

So My Blog Is An Enormous Success

2009-07-27T13:22:00.000-07:00

I get thousands of messages a day saying "Mike, you are an inspiration to the blogging world" and "Please keep adding to your blog because I am in the hospital and it is all I have". The overwhelming number of comments in the comments section of each post is very appreciated by me and my staff. When I installed the hit counter 7 or so days ago I had no idea we would SHATTER 80 views a week later. This is amazing you guys. I am enjoying the ride as much as you are. Just know in your hearts of hearts that this blog is for the children. It's for the people god damn it. Any advertisers interested in capitalizing off of what I have created here (this shining star in the WWW) just email me @ dontsllip@gmail.com.

rgrds

Spot On

2009-07-24T22:32:00.001-07:00

Human Giant; Re-enactment

2009-07-16T23:12:00.001-07:00

lol

Charlie White blows my mind

2009-07-14T23:59:00.000-07:00

www.charliewhite.info

^hotlinked beotch^

Randyyyy (Aziz Ansari) documentary pt. 1

2009-07-13T14:06:00.001-07:00

He's funny and also on Parks and Rec

Raaaaaaaandy - Part 1 (Funny People) from Aziz Ansari

Os Gemeos pt. 2

2009-07-11T16:36:00.001-07:00

I talked to them this time as they were done for the day. They said they will be there for 5 more days. I also talked to them about one of my other favorite artists Blu whom I know they enjoy as well. They said they have been telling Deitch to get Blu to America. Hopefully they will follow through. Here's a few flicks. It is really coming out crazy.
**click the pics to see them bigger**

Radiometricx

2009-07-10T23:26:00.000-07:00

I follow this guy on youtube. He has a ton of videos and ups new ones very regularly and just says whatever he feels like. He's a pretty cool dude and I enjoy listening to him talk. He also has a website that blows my mind

Check His Youtube Page Here

Check his website here

also his twitter page is twitter.com/radiometricx

I pulled this off his website:

"The Portal" episode 1 (2001)
The Portal: Episode 1 - Into The Unknown

Update On My Art Page

2009-07-09T23:28:00.001-07:00

cigart.tumblr.com

Os Gemeos (check the link to the right)

2009-07-09T22:41:00.001-07:00

were painting on Houston St. today. I'm going back tomorrow for more photos. These guys are two of my favorite artists and watching them paint was amazing. They didn't even have to communicate at times. I wanted to fan out and get a photo with them but they stayed up on that ladder.

Bombs #122

2009-07-09T21:14:00.001-07:00

This is a rad short my friend Jared Medeiros made.

2009-07-08T20:55:00.000-07:00

Icelandic Filmmaker, Giovani Von Hye, delivers this thought provoking addition to the Go Green campaign for Steam Works Production.

Steam Works Production
Copywritten 2009, Reyjavik, Iceland

I just came home from my first comedy wrting class

2009-07-08T19:40:00.000-07:00

and this guy was in the class. His name is Wayno Draino. This is him a long time ago. He is now 44 yrs old apparently and loves to talk. He tried to use the class as his platform for promoting what he had done in the 80s. His wife was also there and wanted to write for 2 and a half men and 2 and a half men only.

2009-07-06T23:24:00.000-07:00

I just came across this trailer. I'm speechless literally. I might edit this statement later.

also: I came across this after I saw the actual video of him blowing his head off. Which is on youtube currently. remember the speechless part? yeah.

July 4th Run Down

2009-07-05T13:08:00.000-07:00

Just did a lot of reminiscing about being under Englands rule and gave a lot of thanx for having our independence from the English now.

I just found a Mitch Hedburg Twitter page

2009-07-01T00:20:00.000-07:00

which led me to this Hedburg joke that made me laugh out loud:

Mitch Hedberg
"I like a escalator, man, 'cause an escalator can never break. It can only become stairs."

Amazing Short I Just Found On Youtube

2009-06-30T23:04:00.000-07:00

Google

2009-06-29T00:29:00.000-07:00

Waldo Jeffers had reached his limit. It was now Mid-August which meant he had
been separated from Marsha for more than two months. Two months, and all he had
to show was three dog-eared letters and two very expensive long-distance phone
calls. True, when school had ended and she'd returned to Wisconsin, and he to
Locust, Pennsylvania, she had sworn to maintain a certain fidelity. She would
date occasionally, but merely as amusement. She would remain faithful.

But lately Waldo had begun to worry. He had trouble sleeping at night and when
he did, he had horrible dreams. He lay awake at night, tossing and turning
underneath his pleated quilt protector, tears welling in his eyes as he
pictured Marsha, her sworn vows overcome by liquor and the smooth soothing of
some neanderthal, finally submitting to the final caresses of sexual oblivion.
It was more than the human mind could bear.

Visions of Marsha's faithlessness haunted him. Daytime fantasies of sexual
abandon permeated his thoughts. And the thing was, they wouldn't understand how
she really was. He, Waldo, alone understood this. He had intuitively grasped
every nook and cranny of her psyche. He had made her smile. She needed him, and
he wasn't there (Awww...).

The idea came to him on the Thursday before the Mummers' Parade was scheduled
to appear. He'd just finished mowing and edging the Edelsons lawn for a dollar
fifty and had checked the mailbox to see if there was at least a word from
Marsha. There was nothing but a circular from the Amalgamated Aluminum Company
of America inquiring into his awing needs. At least they cared enough to write.

It was a New York company. You could go anywhere in the mails. Then it struck
him. He didn't have enough money to go to Wisconsin in the accepted fashion,
true, but why not mail himself? It was absurdly simple. He would ship himself
parcel post, special delivery. The next day Waldo went to the supermarket to
purchase the necessary equipment. He bought masking tape, a staple gun and a
medium sized cardboard box just right for a person of his build. He judged that
with a minimum of jostling he could ride quite comfortably. A few airholes,
some water, perhaps some midnight snacks, and it would probably be as good as
going tourist.

By Friday afternoon, Waldo was set. He was thoroughly packed and the post
office had agreed to pick him up at three o'clock. He'd marked the package
"Fragile", and as he sat curled up inside, resting on the foam rubber
cushioning he'd thoughtfully included, he tried to picture the look of awe and
happiness on Marshas face as she opened her door, saw the package, tipped the
deliverer, and then opened it to see her Waldo finally there in person. She
would kiss him, and then maybe they could see a movie. If he'd only thought of
this before. Suddenly rough hands gripped his package and he felt himself borne
up. He landed with a thud in a truck and was off.

Marsha Bronson had just finished setting her hair. It had been a very rough
weekend. She had to remember not to drink like that. Bill had been nice about
it though. After it was over he'd said he still respected her and, after all,
it was certainly the way of nature, and even though, no he didn't love her, he
did feel an affection for her. And after all, they were grown adults. Oh, what
Bill could teach Waldo - but that seemed many years ago.

Sheila Klein, her very, very best friend, walked in through the porch screen
door and into the kitchen. "Oh gawd, it's absolutely maudlin outside." "Ach, I
know what you mean, I feel all icky!" Marsha tightened the belt on her cotton
robe with the silk outer edge. Sheila ran her finger over some salt grains on
the kitchen table, licked her finger and made a face. "I'm supposed to be
taking these salt pills, but," she wrinkled her nose, "they make me feel like
throwing up." Marsha started to pat herself under the chin, an exercise she'd
seen on television. "God, don't even talk about that." She got up from the
table and went to the sink where she picked up a bottle of pink and blue
vitamins. "Want one? Supposed to be better than steak," and then attempted to
touch her knees. "I don't think I'll ever touch a daiquiri again."

She gave up and sat down, this time nearer the small table that supported the
telephone. "Maybe Bill'll call," she said to Sheila's glance. Sheila nibbled on
a cuticle. "After last night, I thought maybe you'd be through with him." "I
know what you mean. My God, he was like an octopus. Hands all over the place."
She gestured, raising her arms upwards in defense. "The thing is, after a
while, you get tired of fighting with him, you know, and after all I didn't
really do anything Friday and Saturday so I kind of owed it to him. You know
what I mean." She started to scratch. Sheila was giggling with her hand over
her mouth. "I'll tell you, I felt the same way, and even after a while," here
she bent forward in a whisper, "I wanted to!" Now she was laughing very loudly.

It was at this point that Mr. Jameson of the Clarence Darrow Post Office rang
the doorbell of the large stucco colored frame house. When Marsha Bronson
opened the door, he helped her carry the package in. He had his yellow and his
green slips of paper signed and left with a fifteen cent tip that Marsha had
gotten out of her mother's small beige pocketbook in the den. "What do you
think it is?" Sheila asked. Marsha stood with her arms folded behind her back.
She stared at the brown cardboard carton that sat in the middle of the living
room. "I dunno."

Inside the package, Waldo quivered with excitement as he listened to the
muffled voices. Sheila ran her fingernail over the masking tape that ran down
the center of the carton. "Why don't you look at the return address and see who
it's from?" Waldo felt his heart beating. He could feel the
vibrating footsteps. It would be soon.

Marsha walked around the carton and read the ink-scratched label. "Ah, god,
it's from Waldo!" "That schmuck!" said Sheila. Waldo trembled with expectation.
"Well, you might as well open it," said Sheila. Both of them tried to lift the
staple flap. "Ah sst," said Marsha, groaning, "he must have nailed it shut."
They tugged on the flap again. "My God, you need a power drill to get this
thing open!" They pulled again. "You can't get a grip." They both stood still,
breathing heavily.

"Why don't you get a scissor," said Sheila. Marsha ran into the kitchen, but
all she could find was a little sewing scissor. Then she remembered that her
father kept a collection of tools in the basement. She ran downstairs, and when
she came back up, she had a large sheet metal cutter
in her hand. "This is the best I could find." She was very out of breath.
"Here, you do it. I-I'm gonna die." She sank into a large fluffy couch and
exhaled noisily. Sheila tried to make a slit between the masking tape and the
end of the cardboard flap, but the blade was too big and there wasn't enough
room. "God damn this thing!" she said feeling very exasperated. Then smiling,
"I got an idea." "What?" said Marsha. "Just watch," said Sheila, touching her
finger to her head.

Inside the package, Waldo was so transfixed with excitement that he could
barely breathe. His skin felt prickly from the heat, and he could feel his
heart beating in his throat. It would be soon. Sheila stood quite upright and
walked around to the other side of the package. Then she sank down to her
knees, grasped the cutter by both handles, took a deep breath, and plunged the
long blade through the middle of the package, through the masking tape, through
the cardboard, through the cushioning and (thud) right through the center of
Waldo Jeffers head, which split slightly and caused little rhythmic arcs of red
to pulsate gently in the morning sun.

Pawn shops can play an important roll during a recession

2009-06-28T21:40:00.000-07:00

Under The Tutelage of Randy Tutelage

2009-06-28T00:05:00.000-07:00

Zach

Philosophy 101

2009-06-27T17:58:00.001-07:00

If Sleep is the cousin of Death, then Death must be jealous of how rad his cousin is.

ive decided to start logging these stupid things I come up with.

New Concept Here:

2009-06-27T00:40:00.000-07:00

Things that I think suck:

Rain
Not sleeping
Working
Rap Music
Dog Shit
Bugs
Rashes
Public Restrooms
Waking Up
Injuries
Bills
Different strands of flu
Being hungry
Double chins
Sweat
Wet floors
Shared towels
Bathrooms after #2s
Flying
Natural disasters
Diseases are gross
Itchy clothes
Williamsburg
"Sneaker Heads"
Time
Heroin
Autotune
Nausea
Heartburn
Indegestion
Upset Stomach
Diarrhea
Nick Cannon
Chores
Scratched DVDs
Changing lightbulbs
Most ppl that love clubs
Cole Slaw
Carrot ginger dressing
Brett Favre
CDs
Shaving
Cords and Wires
Not being able to procrastinate

Comments from a website I work for

2009-06-22T22:06:00.000-07:00

These are some comments left (in the comments section) of some of the posts that get put up on the website I work for. Enjoy these. The stories that get the most comments usually have something to do with a female as you can see below.

"I’D GET HER SEXY ASS PREGNANT, AND DEN I’D WIFE HER"

"id just get her pregnant…lol then id bounce"

"man i would tear dat ass up like its no tomorrow and i wuld get her pregnant"

"damn girl you lookin real strung out… i just finshed servin a custee lookin just like her in the 2nd pic. she should turn in her pussy at the next rest area."

"lmao, dat bitch look gone as hell, dat white girl been hittin 2 much of dat white girl, ya feel me"

"Well how about instead of wearing a great person like Kanye, lets just wear all those weak ass records u made that weren’t hits u stupid fucking pink bitch fall back fuckin hater. Seems like its always a cracker tryna go at a black person."

"Get out his face hoe.. Mr.West is the greatest alive and im tired of you damn white ppl talking about saving animals and shit bitch fuck that!!!!!!How bout you save the starving kids in America cunt instead of running your lame nonsinging ass mouth.. Suck a dick quick and swallow that white shit!!1"

"I hate PETA motha fuckaz. Pink had a nice lil body and some swag when she 1st came out. Now she is a gross has been trying to get some attention. Show biz… she should be trying to suck the nigga off honestly."

"fuck that eat chicken and have bbqs nigga fuck off white hoe!"

"my nigga jeezy needa get rowdy and knock juicemans weak ass out…juiceman lame as fuk…and for gucci fuk that clown too..i meman i fuks wit gucci when i wanna hear some trunk music…but i always listen to my nigga jeezy reguardless"

"Fuck Jeezy he pussy anyway!!! They gone put jeezy ass on ice like they did TI. jeezy dont want no beef wit the kings of trap They bout they money….AAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!
"
"that gucci lookin fruity mane"

"id eat outta her ass…on life i would"

Synesthesia

2009-06-22T11:19:00.000-07:00

My friend Jeff just sent this over to me. I like it so here I am posting it.

Synesthesia by Terri Timely from Pamala Buzick on Vimeo.

Every Person In New York

2009-06-20T21:59:00.000-07:00

http://everypersoninnewyork.blogspot.com/

Is It Snow?

2009-06-14T11:45:00.001-07:00

New Link ---------->

2009-06-11T14:48:00.000-07:00

Minimal-wave.org

Check it out. Also go to the East Village Radio link they have on the left. It links to an awesome show with all archives.

Ipren

2009-06-11T14:00:00.001-07:00

This Was The Future Of Video Games

2009-06-11T13:57:00.001-07:00

Yes

2009-06-10T21:50:00.000-07:00

Minutemen

2009-06-09T01:54:00.000-07:00

Manny Mania 09

2009-06-08T12:02:00.000-07:00

Didn't go, but Eli won. Good shit.

Zoo York Video Premier

2009-06-04T21:43:00.000-07:00

At the Sunshine theater on Houston. Just got back. Vid is dope. Real good soundtrack. I was trying to work on getting some songs cleared with the kid that was helping them out with that. They did a good job. Theater was packed. Eli definitely had the best part. He was doing some Mariano in Mouse shit at times. Good video, I'm definitely buying it when it comes out officially.